Lava Shit

Imagine a volcano erupting, spewing chunks of molten rock and lava. Now imagine shit, dark brown smelly shit. Now imagine both of that coming out of your ass. Lava Shit.

Common causes of lava shit are:
1)Mc Spicy burger.
2)Double Mc Spicy burger.
3)Ma La Hotpot of doom.
4)Spicy Tom Yum anything.
5)Foods with a tiny chili icon beside its name in the menu.
6)The sweet chili given together with the bee hoon mee at S11.

Common remedies for post lava shit trauma (the damn stinging sensation that lingers around the hole which only intensifies when clenched):
1)Rinse with cold running water for 5 mins.
2)Rinse with cold running water for 10 mins.
3)Rinse with cold running water for 15 mins.

Disambiguation:
1)The Mudslide - Much like the lava shit, its chunky and flows like lava. But its not hot, cool as mud. Watch out for splashes.
2)The Waterfall - No chunks. Just rapid flow of black brown stinking liquid. Sometimes bubbly. Watch out for splashes.
3)Diarrhea - Usually a combination of The Mudslide and The Waterfall together with vomiting and the occasional fever.

Cheers.

Salvation

The day is drawing nearer as each day ends! The day where we no longer have to dread, complain about, sigh at. ORD soon loh!

and what do i do after i ORD?

Monday: wake up at 6am. expend energy till 10am. eat lunch till 12noon. sleep* till 4pm. expend more energy till 7pm. dinner till 9pm. sleep at 12am.
Tuesday: same as monday
Wednesday: same as monday too.
Thursday: same as monday too too.
Friday: same as monday too too too.
Saturday: wake up at 6am. expend energy till 10am. eat lunch till 12noon. go out watch a movie/dinner till 7pm. time with my girlfriend till 4am.
Sunday: wake up at 12 noon. time with my girlfriend till 12am

I gotta love my bah long long life.
*= can me replaced with "time with my girlfriend"

Feeling inspired to blog nonsense again.